A school master from Bihar was transferred to a new Kendriya School in Mumbai. He reported for duty two days before August 15 and, as was the practice in the school, was asked to address the school assembly on Independence Day.

Here's his dynamite speech :
Leddies and Gentulmens, Contemporaries, Children,
"This is my first maiden! speech. If small small mistakes get inside my speech, I ask pardon.
Stickly speaking, I wanted to joint your school more fastly,
but for the following reason. Too much time lost in getting slipper reservation in three-tyre compartment. The clerk rejected to give ticket.
I put complaint on station master. He ! said me to goto lady clerk.

At first she also rejected. I then pressed her for long time and at last with great difficulty she gave a birth only to my son.

Anyway I thanked the station master because he was responsible for getting birth of my son.

We got independent because of great leaders like Gandhiji who get-outted all angrezi peoples from! India.

Tilak said Swaraj is our birth-rate and we shall halve it.

Today we all have our birth-rate.You children are future dynamic generators of the Nation.

Look into future time only. No backside looking, or looking at your behind.

Be like great like X' raj Ranjan of Germany or Presidents like Loosebelt, Dim
Butter, Lipton etc. You know genius! , no?
It is one per cent perspiration and ninety seven
percent evaporation.

They became great by reading great books.

After we finish you off here in the chool, you can go to college and get B.A., M.A.,
M.A.M.A and other decrease.

Then you can become great liars in the supreme courts, shattered accountants, or leacherers in college.

The school ! is like a garden.
You are the seeds, classroom is the soil. We will bury you in this soil,
pour water of knowledge on your heads and one day
you all will become great phools.

Many vacancy job come in newzpeppers.
Only yesterday I saw in paper "Wanted for refuted engineering firm:
Generators, highpower &! gt; condensors" so and so forth, etc.

These jobs may be teknickel, but you can shine. If you haveflare in English, you can
become teacher.

 I am now ending this fastly.

My God blast you

Thank you and thank God I am phinish.

Joy Hind!"phew!!